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Semiramis

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Fictional Character

The Resume

    Legendary Queen of Assyria (modern-day parts of Iraq, Syria, Turkey and Iran)
    Succeeded her late husband, King Ninus, as ruler of most of known Asia for 42 years
    Major part of Assyrian/Mesopotamian folklore; mainly in Asia Minor, Arabia, Armenia, the Caucasus, the Levant, and Persia
    Very likely based on the Assyrian Queen, Shammuramat, wife of King Shamshi Adad V (ruled 824-811 BC)

Why she might be annoying:

    She was allegedly raised by doves and had a fish goddess for a mother.
    She married her son after her King Ninus died, mainly to maintain control and power.
    Some legends also claim she ordered her son to be killed when he tried to claim the throne.
    There is a continuous debate as to whether or not she ever really existed.
    Ancient scholars tried to attribute the Hanging Gardens of Babylon to her, but it has since been proven that they were built long after the time that she would have reigned.
    Legend has it her first husband, a General to Ninus, committed suicide when Ninus threatened to 'put his eyes out' unless he allowed him to take her for his Queen.
    When her husband was fatally wounded in battle by an arrow, she impersonated her teenage son to give orders to his soldiers (they would have believed her son was the rightful heir to the throne).
    She tried, and failed, to conquer India with fake artisan-crafted elephants. They ended up retreating west of the Indus when the ruse didn't work.
    Her story has been used by conspiracy theorists to promote their notion that the major monotheist religions are in fact just retellings of ancient pagan myths.
    The most bizarre theory claims that she had a key role in a Reptilian alien conspiracy which still secretly controls the planet and humanity.
    In the 19th Century, Christian ministers began to argue that she not only 'really existed' but that she was also an actual Goddess who invented polytheism and female idolatry. They also claimed she was mistress to the Biblical Whore of Babylon and mistress to King Nimrod.

Why she might not be annoying:

    She inspired a tragedy by Voltaire.
    She was portrayed by Rhonda Fleming..
    Her name remains a popular one for girls throughout the Middle East.
    She may have invented the chastity belt.
    She restored the Ancient city of Babylon.
    She may have overseen the building of several palaces in Persia, including Ecbatana.
    Legends claim that she helped the Assyrian Empire to expand further into Asia and even into parts of Africa.
    Armenian legend depicts her as a clever seductress who puts an end to their war with the Assyrians by tricking them into believing that she resurrected their slain ruler she had killed.
    Whether or not she truly existed, her legend clearly influenced the design of many Assyrian, Mesopotamian, Greek, and Roman designs and relics, by extension influencing Western art.
    She may have indirectly influenced the designs for the Statue of Liberty, the Columbia Pictures logo, and even the Starbucks Coffee icon.

Credit: BoyWiththeGreenHair


Featured in the following Annoying Collections:

Year In Review:

    For 2024, as of last weekly ranking, Out of 2 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2023, Out of 2 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2021, Out of 8 Votes: 62.50% Annoying
    In 2020, Out of 1 Votes: 100% Annoying
    In 2019, Out of 34 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2018, Out of 37 Votes: 48.65% Annoying
    In 2017, Out of 12 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2016, Out of 2 Votes: 50.0% Annoying
    In 2015, Out of 12 Votes: 50.0% Annoying